My Corner.

My corner.

We all have this place that we go to when we’re ecstatic, when we’re down, when we’re pensive, when we’re at the depths of depression, when we want to be at peace with ourselves. I’m not sure how it is for everyone else, but I have a place. For some of you it may be the beach, for some the terrace of your houses, for some it may be your rooms, a spot somewhere. Wherever! And no, I am not referring to an outlet like music/movies/food/activities/a person/visiting the mall. I am referring to this physical place you go to, to vent, think, weep, laugh, love, feel at ease, be at peace. A place where you visit, then form your own little cocoon and revel in that moment, savoring the solitude and the freedom to feel what you want to without eyes that pry. I have such a place. Or I had one at least. A place that I used to visit daily, and pour out every facet of every emotion, I went through that day. What’s even more special about that place? Sometimes, my little friend would come and sit with me there, just looking around along with me and silently reassuring me that no matter what she will be with me till the end.  By friend, I mean one of the three most precious things to me- my baby, “Neema” (my pet dachshund). Sometimes when I let out silent tears, she’d reach up to my face to shower a thousand kisses and in that moment, nothing else would seem significant and I’d lose myself in that love. This corner that I am referring to has been with me since my early teens until the very last moment that I left it. Its pendulum of a motion rocked away all those elements of negativity or if I was happy, encouraged me to bask in that happiness. Now that I am thousands of miles away, I have no such place nor such a friend to share that kind of a Nirvana, with.

As I was missing this corner, I got thinking. I sat in that corner and I’d let my mind wander and think of thousand different possibilities of how situations could have played out or how I wanted things to go. I sat there and wept. I sat there in glee when tiny things would lighten up my day. I sat there and enjoyed a hot bowl of whatever I liked to eat. In all this, it was just me. Me who guided my mind/heart. Me who thought to myself, analyzing every thread of every thought in my head. So, was it really the place? Did I think and feel as much when I was at work or when I was in bed or when I was outside, elsewhere? Did that place really bring out the most private side of me? Or was it just my mind that had me convinced that, that was the place where I unwind?

Well, I don’t really know any of that. I do know that that place shared a significant portion of my life, more than any living entity has shared/known of. At least for that reason, I love it and yearn for it. I am missing a portion of me. Just a day with my corner is enough to rekindle every fire in me that made me who I am, today.

My corner- the Swing in my balcony, back at home in Chennai, where I’d come home and swing on it like a child in her playground with no boundaries for imagination and no fences for thoughts!

Food for thought.